Sunday, January 12, 2014

10 Ways To Sabotage Your Man As A Husband And Father

This post is part of the Happy Wives Club Blog Tour which I am delighted to be a part of along with hundreds of inspiring bloggers. To learn more and join us, CLICK HERE!  

Making your home sing Mondays

Welcome to the Making Your Home Sing Monday linky party! Every day you are doing something to make your house into a home for yourself and your family (if you have one). 

My point with each Monday post is, what are YOU doing or going to do today to make your home sing?  It can be an attitude or an action. So have fun, do some blog hopping, and link up!  Thanks!

Topics can include marriage, parenting, encouraging women, organization, cleaning, saving money, our behavior and attitudes, homemaking, homeschooling, recipes.....the opportunities are endless.

Note: We had 86 linkups last week!  You guys are awesome!  Don't forget to visit one another and try to leave a comment on at least one blog to encourage someone today!  :)  

On the left sidebar (down towards the bottom) is the "Making Your Home Sing! Monday" button which you are welcome to grab and paste into your post!  It is a "no-follow" button.

Are you happily married but want more joy in your marriage?  Do you want to continue to grow more in love with your husband every day?  Do you want him to continue to grow more in love with you?

Do you want to be a blessing to him?  Do you want your children to love, honor and respect him?

If so, then here is a list of things NOT to do:

1.  Make fun of him when he shows his softer side.  Laugh at him and tease him (in a mean way) and don't forget to tell your friends what a "big baby" he is right in front of him.  Tell him you thought you married a MAN, not a baby.

2.  When he asks "what's wrong?" don't tell him.  Expect him to know what you're feeling.  After all, if he really loved you, he would KNOW why you're upset, right?  Refuse to talk to him.  Just yell at him to "GO AWAY!!!!!" whenever he tries to ask "What's wrong?" or asks how he can help.

3.  Ask him to help you with something and then criticize the way he does it.  Seriously, he's HOW OLD and he can't manage to load the dishwasher the "right" way?  How ridiculous is that?  Redo everything he does.  Take everything out of the dishwasher, slam it on the counter, and reload it.  If he cleans the bathroom, heave a big sigh and say "I wish you'd stop 'helping' me!" and clean it again.  If he vacuums, vacuum it again so the rug pattern goes the "right" way.  Let him know he's not good enough and his help isn't appreciated.

4.  Treat him like he's another one of your children.  You don't have two children, you have THREE children, right?  Tell him that, all the time.  Boss him around constantly.   Tell him "No," he's not getting another cookie.  Remind him that he can't have dessert because he didn't eat all of his vegetables. Be sure and scold him in front of the children when he walks too slow or does something you think is wrong.  After all, you don't want the kids to grow up respecting their dad, do you?

5.  Tell his deepest secrets to all of your friends and his friends and have a good laugh at his expense.  Try to make him feel stupid whenever possible.  Laughter is good for the soul and your hubby gives you some great material every day, doesn't he?  When he claims he can't trust you because you told his secrets, try and look apologetic and say "Sorry, it just slipped out."  Then do it again the next time he tells you something in confidence.

6.  When he makes a bad mistake, or if you have a fight, question his abilities, intelligence and manhood and bash him to all your friends.  Be sure and use words like "dumb," or "stupid," or "wimp."  Try to humiliate him by posting it all over facebook so that everyone can see what an "idiot" you married and don't ever let him forget his mistake.  Post about your fight and make sure that he looks bad and you look good.

7.  Compare him to an old boyfriend or your friend's husband.  Say "Sometimes I wonder why I ever married you" or "Sarah's husband makes THREE TIMES as much as you do!" or "Teresa's husband is so romantic. She sure is blessed.  I wish I had a husband like that," etc.  If you don't want to say it to his face, just think about it every day so that you become discontent.  He will eventually figure it out.

8.  Criticize him and talk about his faults in front of your children.  Make sure that they know that he has no real authority over them.  Make sure they understand that YOU are the boss and whatever daddy says doesn't count.  Try and get them to agree with you by asking the right kind of questions, such as "Daddy sure doesn't know anything" or "Daddy sure is selfish, isn't he?" Tell them "Just ignore daddy, o.k.?"

9.  Degrade his job whenever you can.  Bonus points if you talk about what a lousy job he has in front of friends.  Belittle every promotion he gets or every positive thing that he does in his job.  Make sure that he knows that nothing he does will ever be good enough for you until he earns the kind of money you think you deserve and has the kind of job you think is worthwhile and important.  Let him know his job is an embarrassment to your parents.

10.  Demean any attempts he makes at being romantic or loving.  Make sure he knows that he is a big failure in romance and in the bedroom.  If he brings you a single rose, let him know that a bouquet would have been better.  If he brings you a dozen roses, make sure he knows they are the wrong color or the wrong flower.  If he tries to woo you into the bedroom, let him know that the flu would be preferable to spending that time alone with him.

If you try these things, you will be well on your way to a miserable marriage!  So I suggest that you avoid them and go hug that loving man of yours and tell him you are so blessed to be married to him!  ;)

What are you doing or going to do today to make your home sing? Please go here for instructions and/or ideas and come back here to link up to join us today! Please do not put your own "Making Your Home Sing Monday" Linky on your blog.

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Fawn Weaver, the founder of the Happy Wives Club wrote a book about the best marriage secrets the world has to offer. They say the book is like “Eat, Pray, Love meets The 5 Love Languages.” I say the book is inspiring. You can grab a copy HERE.

Also, I am linking up to these linky parties: 

TheBetterMom.comWhat Joy Is MinePhotobucketHappy Wives Club
Living Proverbs 31 Strangers and Pilgrims on Earth
125 Titus 2 Tuesday Button Teaching What Is Good Messy MarriageFamily Home and LifeWise-Woman-Builds All Things with Purposekatherines corner Photobucket


  1. This is such a well-thought out and on-target list, Nan. I hate to say it, but I've probably done at least 8 out of the 10 you mentioned at different points in my marriage. And every time I do it, I see how it discourages my husband and drives a wedge between us. Thanks for reminding us of the noble calling we have as wives to honor and not tear down our husbands, my friend!

    1. Oh I know,my friend! We've all made some mistakes along the way. Early in our marriage I struggled with #2 and #3. I expected him to "know" what I was thinking and feeling, and I would redo stuff that he had done! I still will occasionally repack the dishwasher if I'm desperate to get more in but usually will just let it go, lol!

  2. Such excellent advice! Thanks for the great post & for hosting & God bless!

  3. Oh my, number 10 is definitely convicting for me! I think that sometimes I shun my husband's attempts at romance because he isn't doing things the way *I* want. How selfish of me! Thank you for this exhortation--definitely some things I need to work on!

    1. Maybe it's just a difference of your love languages! My husband's "love language" is verbal affirmation and mine is touch, so he likes words of confirmation and I like hugs. Sometimes I tend to love in MY love language so I have to make sure that I am also loving him in *his* love language!

  4. I've looked a couple of times and I do not see a place to link up to the party. It's early and I'm still nursing my first cup of coffee so it could just be me.

    1. The linky website was down earlier but it's up and the linky party is up now. Sorry for the delay! :)

  5. Hi Nan!! I'm back!! I've missed you humor and serious posts. This is such a good reminder when we live in a society that is constantly cutting their man down. We need to guard our hearts in this area (so convicting) since we hear comments like this all around us. Women will say something like this with a tone that belies that it is alright to think that way about our dear husband.

    Thanks for the linkup party. I have been trying to get back in the swing of blogging but has technical issues way beyond my capabilities last week. I am so late linking up today that I never realized you had issues with your party :-) Hope everyone comes back and tries you again.

  6. Your list made me laugh! So much truth here...with a good dose of humor.

    Thanks for sharing!

  7. Hi! Stopping by from the Thursday Favorite Things Blog Hop at Katherine's Corner . . . love this list, there is so much wisdom in your words. Thanks for sharing. Stop by and visit me when you get a minute at mamas*little*treasures. Hope to see you soon!

  8. a wise post in deed. I am so happy you shared this post at the Thursday Favorite Things Blog Hop . Big Hugs


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