Sunday, July 28, 2013

When Is It O.K. To Say "No?" & MYHSM Linky Party

Making your home sing Mondays

Welcome to the Making Your Home Sing Monday linky party! Every day you are doing something to make your house into a home for yourself and your family (if you have one). 

My point with each Monday post is, what are YOU doing or going to do today to make your home sing?  It can be an attitude or an action. So have fun, do some blog hopping, and link up!  Thanks!


Topics can include marriage, parenting, encouraging women, organization, cleaning, saving money, our behavior and attitudes, homemaking, homeschooling, recipes....the opportunities are endless.


Note:  We had 104 linkups last week which is awesome!  I'm sorry I wasn't able to visit all of you, but I do thank you and appreciate you linking up!  Don't forget to visit one another and try to leave a comment on at least one blog to encourage someone today!  :)

When my husband and I first got married I had trouble saying "no" to people.  Anything anyone asked me to do at anytime, I said "yes."  Without hesitation. Without thought or prayer.  Whether I wanted to or not.

Hubby knew I had a problem saying no and so he agreed to say "no" for me.  So for our first year of marriage I used my hubby as an excuse to say "no" to everyone who asked me to do anything that I didn't feel led or like I wanted to do.   Now, obviously I said "yes" if a friend invited me out for ice cream. Duhhhhhh.......


Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at FreeDigitalPhotos.net


But if it didn't feel like it would be a good fit or decision for me, I said "I'm sorry, my hubby said no."

That worked for a year until my husband said that everyone must hate him, lol!  It was time for me to take responsibility and learn to say no for myself.  Sometimes we just have to develop our "just say no" muscles!

For some of us, it can be hard to say no.  We want to please someone, help someone, or we aren't sure whether this would be something God would have us to do or not.  We're worried about disappointing God or making someone mad at us.  So we struggle.  We wonder, when is it o.k. to say "no?"

Image courtesy of Andy Newson at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Every situation can be different and, as always, you should seek the Lord because sometimes, what looks like a NO should be a YES!   But sometimes, it should be a "no."  Fun trying to figure it out, huh?!

Here are some things you might want to consider when you're struggling with saying "no."

1.  Say no when your schedule is so packed that this will stress and overwhelm you.

2.  Say no when someone is trying to bully you into saying "yes" or trying to guilt you into it.

3.  Say no when your spirit is telling you that this is a bad idea.

4.  Say no when this would cause you to consistently set aside your other God given priorities, such as your family, and this would not line up with the goals/priorities you feel God has given you.

5.  Say no when your husband asks you to.  He is your spiritual authority and often, when we are all confused and muddled about what to do, God will speak through our husbands.  We need to listen to them!

Of course, there are times when you may think of saying yes.  But before you do:

1.  Make a commitment to pray over a decision and give it some time to think about it.  Tell the person you need 24 hours before you get back to them.

2.  Check your calendar.  Take a realistic look at your week.  Do you have time to bake 3 dozen cookies on Wednesday?

3.  If you're feeling uncomfortable about the decision, ask and pray about whether you are uncomfortable because of your schedule constraints or just because it's outside your comfort zone.  Maybe God wants to stretch you and maybe your "no" should be a "yes."

4.  Don't allow yourself to be pressured or bullied into a decision.  Pay attention to your instincts and gut reaction and be prayerful.

5.  Seek wise counsel.  This is the time to talk it over with your husband, seek advice of people that you trust and respect when it's a big decision and you are wrestling with it.

Sometimes saying "yes" will be added stress and yet we will say yes because it feels like the right thing to do. That's o.k.  There are times in our lives where we're going through stress and difficulty but we can't say no to everything.


Sometimes our "no" needs to be a "yes" so that we can faithfully live out what we believe and let God show Himself strong and walk us through it.

What are YOU struggling with today?  Is it a "yes or a "no?"  Trust Him for wisdom today and make your home sing!

What are you doing or going to do today to make your home sing? Please go here for instructions and/or ideas and come back here to link up to join us today! Please do not put your own "Making Your Home Sing Monday" Linky on your blog.


If you don't want to miss any blogs posts, you can subscribe
by 
RSS, Bloglovin, Feedly
Facebook or Email 

I'd love to connect with you!



I am  linking up to these linky  parties:


TheBetterMom.comWhat Joy Is MinePhotobucketHappy Wives ClubLiving Proverbs 31i should be mopping the floor photo e70fb310-7eb7-4908-bb0e-cac50857a9bb.jpg
The Alabaster JarThe Life Of Faith photo NEWRIButton275x150_zpsf908716b.jpg 125 Titus 2 Tuesday ButtonCourtship ConnectionTeaching What Is Good Messy MarriageDucks 'n a Row\ Family Home and Life\ http://www.wildernesswife.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/Wicked-Good-Wednesday-Blog-Hop-Button.jpgWise-Woman-Builds  All Things with Purposekatherines corner PhotobucketMissional Womenhttp://christianmommyblogger.comHappyandBlessedHome.com Please save image and put it in your post or on your sidebar.Faithful Friday Blog Hop Share The Love

Thursday, July 25, 2013

How I Helped Superman Save The World & Broke A Nail In The Process



I don't mind sacrificing a nail for something brave and valiant.

Such as breaking a nail rescuing a kitty from a burning house.  Or breaking a nail because I chased down a thief who stole a sweet elderly lady's purse.

Or flying a fighter jet into the jungle to rescue a band of lost pizza making employees.  Or winning an Olympic gold medal in the shot put only to break a nail in the process.

This all seems reasonable and totally something that might happen to me and I'd be willing to sacrifice my nail for any ONE of those things.  Really I would.

But to lose it to something as simple and mundane as putting away a load of towels is just not right.  It's not fair either.  To lose a nail doing my regular homemaking duties is just so......boring.

So, I want you to know that I did NOT break my nail trying to put the towels away.

You see, what happened was this.  I was minding my own business and suddenly there was a knock at the door.

I opened it and Superman and Spider-Man were there.  They visit me sometimes when they need help. Poor guys, they really can't make it on their own.  They need me.

I told them I couldn't go as I was busy making lunch but they started whining.

Superman got mad because I asked him to use his x-ray vision to see if my hard boiled eggs were done and Spider-Man became offended when I asked him to kill a spider.

Finally I agreed to help them as long as Spider-Man stayed off my ceiling and Superman quit flying around the house like a fly desperately seeking an open window.

We took off and went looking for trouble.  We didn't have to go far.  It found us.

Superman took on two guys, Spidey took on two guys, and I took on the other 87 guys.

And THAT, my friends, is how I broke a nail.  Like a Boss.

By the way........I won.........


If you don't want to miss any blogs posts, you can subscribe
by 
RSS, Bloglovin, Feedly
Facebook or Email 

I'd love to connect with you!

Be sure and come back Monday and link up to the Making Your Home Sing Monday  linky party!

Sunday, July 21, 2013

What Household Chore Do YOU Ignore? Make It A Non-Negotiable


Making your home sing Mondays

Welcome to the Making Your Home Sing Monday linky party! Every day you are doing something to make your house into a home for yourself and your family (if you have one). 

My point with each Monday post is, what are YOU doing or going to do today to make your home sing?  It can be an attitude or an action. So have fun, do some blog hopping, and link up!  Thanks!


Topics can include marriage, parenting, encouraging women, organization, cleaning, saving money, our behavior and attitudes, homemaking, homeschooling, recipes....the opportunities are endless.


Note:  We had 86 linkups last week which is awesome!  I'm sorry I wasn't able to visit all of you, but I do thank you and appreciate you linking up!  Don't forget to visit one another and try to leave a comment on at least one blog to encourage someone today!  :)


Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I don't know about you but I can ignore certain things around my house. To a certain point.

I can ignore the dog hair piling up on the floor.  I can ignore the baskets of clean laundry waiting to be folded.  I can ignore the hamper of dirty laundry waiting to be washed.

I can ignore the dust on the wood furniture and I can ignore the lint on the carpet.  I can ignore the bed not being made.

I can ignore the water spots on the bathroom mirror and toothpaste spatter in the sink.  I can ignore the makeup that I left out on the kitchen counter.

I can ignore the mail or papers piling up on the table.  I can ignore the garbage can that is getting full and needs to be emptied soon.

I can ignore all of this for at least a day or two, some of them maybe even more.

But I cannot ignore the dirty dishes piling up in the kitchen sink.  I can't ignore the clutter piling up on the kitchen counters.

At least, not very often.  I suppose you could say that it is a non-negotiable.  I pretty much have to have my kitchen clean every day.

Long ago I decided to make a clean kitchen a non-negotiable.  Before that, my kitchen was almost always a mess. But one day I decided that I was tired of the mess and I wanted to wake up to a clean kitchen every morning.

In order to do that, it meant I had to go to bed with a clean kitchen every night.

It was that simple. I made one "rule" and stuck to it.

By saying I wanted to wake up to a clean kitchen it meant several things had to happen:

1.  It meant that I had to unpack the groceries right away and put them away, instead of leaving the canned goods in the grocery bags for days on end.

2.  It meant that I had to train myself (and eventually our future children) to load the dirty dishes straight into the dishwasher rather than leaving them in the sink all day.

3.  It meant that I had to unload the dishwasher every morning so that I could load it back up again with dirty dishes throughout the day.

4.  It meant that I had to remember to actually RUN the dishwasher at night so that I could unload it in the morning.

5.  It meant that I had to clean up the kitchen after every meal so that I wasn't faced with cleaning three meals worth of dishes before bed.

6.  It meant that I had to put my meal making supplies away, rather than leaving them out.  In other words, I had to put the peanut butter and jelly away after making a sandwich, had to put the flour and sugar away when baking something, had to put the spices away when making dinner, etc., instead of leaving it all out on the counters.

7.  It meant that I had to wash any dishes that couldn't fit into the dishwasher rather than leaving them in the sink.

8.  It meant that I had to stay on top of my grocery shopping so that I could make sure I had dishwasher detergent or dish soap in the house so that I could wash the dishes.

It meant that I had to establish the habit of cleaning my kitchen. Period.  It had to become something that I didn't have to argue myself into or motivate myself to do or bribe myself into doing every day.  It had to become a habit.  But it didn't start as a habit.

It started as just something that I wanted to do and felt I needed to do and so I DECIDED I was going to do it. So I did it.

The next day, I decided to do it again.  I made the decision to do it over and over and over, until it became a habit.

But it wasn't just ONE habit that I had to learn.  It was several habits, all rolled together to make one thing happen: a clean kitchen.


Sometimes, we have things we want to do, but we don't take steps to make them happen.  We say "I want a clean kitchen" but then we don't do the things needed to GET it clean and keep it clean.  Wishing will not make it so.  You have to take that first step, and then the next step, and so on.

Let's say you want to keep your living room or family room neat and orderly.  It's not going to magically happen.  You need to establish some habits, such as returning the dirty dishes to the kitchen (or establish a rule that you don't eat in the living room), put the newspaper away when you're done reading it, put the shoes and coats away where they belong, put the children's toys away (and teach your children to do it when they're old enough), etc.

You're not going to get your kitchen, bathroom or any other room clean by establishing just ONE habit and not doing anything else.


However, ONE habit can build upon another habit, which can build upon another habit and pretty soon, you have the clean kitchen that you wanted.




What household chore or chores do YOU ignore that you want to become a habit in your life?  Is it cleaning the sink? Making your bed?  Cleaning the bathroom?

Today, I encourage you to select a non-negotiable in your home or in your life.  What is your motivation?  Why is it important?  Is it going to make your life easier?  Will you be less embarrassed when people drop by?  Will it improve your health?  In other words, why is this going to be a non-negotiable for you?

Once you decide what it's going to be, decide how you're going to get there.  What steps can you take to make this a reachable goal?  What habits can you establish NOW to get there?

What ways can you motivate yourself to do it every day until you reach your goal or it becomes a daily habit?  Can you make it fun? (i.e. race the timer, promise yourself a chapter of your favorite book after you do it, or maybe buy a new outfit if your goal is to lose weight, etc.)

What are the rules or habits that you need to establish to get there and, once you are there, to STAY there?

Then pick one or two of those habits that you need to establish in your life and begin to work on them, every day, until they become a non-negotiable habit.  Then add a couple more habits.



What is YOUR non-negotiable in your house or your life?
Why do you want or need this to be a non-negotiable?
What are you going to do to GET there and.....
When you are there, what habits do you need to establish to STAY there?

Dream big and start small and you will reach your goal and make your home sing!

What are you doing or going to do today to make your home sing? Please go here for instructions and/or ideas and come back here to link up to join us today! Please do not put your own "Making Your Home Sing Monday" Linky on your blog.


If you don't want to miss any blogs posts, you can subscribe
by 
RSS, Bloglovin, Feedly
Facebook or Email 

I'd love to connect with you!




I am linking up to these linky  parties:


TheBetterMom.comWhat Joy Is MinePhotobucketHappy Wives ClubLiving Proverbs 31i should be mopping the floor photo e70fb310-7eb7-4908-bb0e-cac50857a9bb.jpg
The Alabaster JarThe Life Of Faith photo NEWRIButton275x150_zpsf908716b.jpg  125 Titus 2 Tuesday ButtonGrowing HomeCourtship ConnectionTeaching What Is Good Messy MarriageDucks 'n a RowFamily Home and Lifehttp://www.wildernesswife.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/Wicked-Good-Wednesday-Blog-Hop-Button.jpgWise-Woman-Builds  All Things with Purposekatherines corner PhotobucketMissional Womenhttp://christianmommyblogger.comHappyandBlessedHome.com Please save image and put it in your post or on your sidebar.Faithful Friday Blog Hop