Sunday, August 25, 2013

Let Them Grow & Let Them Go & MYHSM Linky Party


Making your home sing Mondays


Welcome to the Making Your Home Sing Monday linky party! Every day you are doing something to make your house into a home for yourself and your family (if you have one). 

My point with each Monday post is, what are YOU doing or going to do today to make your home sing?  It can be an attitude or an action. So have fun, do some blog hopping, and link up!  Thanks!


Topics can include marriage, parenting, encouraging women, organization, cleaning, saving money, our behavior and attitudes, homemaking, homeschooling, recipes....the opportunities are endless.


Note:  We had 90 linkups last week which is awesome!  Don't forget to visit one another and try to leave a comment on at least one blog to encourage someone today!  :)


Image courtesy of gubgib at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I remember when my children were little, it was so comforting to know that I could keep them "safe" to the best of my ability.

I knew where they were at night.  Safe in their own beds.  They were too young to drive and too young to hang out with their friends on their own.  They were HOME.

They were little boys and my husband and I were able to pretty much control their environment and control what we allowed into our homes and control the major influences in their lives (as much as a parent can).

I felt safe having that control. I LIKED having that control.  I continually prayed for them and trusted them into God's hands.  Then I wrapped myself up in my comforting blanket of control.  It was hard to even think of letting go.

I often wondered how a parent coped when their children grew up.  How would I cope when they were out of my control?  How would I handle it when they were out in the world without me?  How would I be able to sleep knowing they were out there driving a car????



You can wrap your child up so tight that they will struggle desperately to get loose.  And you can hold them so loosely that they will struggle desperately to get your attention....it's a balance.

As they begin to grow, you begin to give up a little measure of your control.  You let them play outside alone for the first time.  You let them ride their bike on the sidewalk or street.

They begin to make friends on their own, develop a taste for music, start to have definite opinions about what they want to wear or how they want to style their hair.

I remember when my youngest did not want me to part and comb his hair away from his forehead anymore.  I LOVED his hair all nice and neat and little-man-like, but he wanted it to just lay flat on his head with no "fancy" part.  So I let him wear his hair the way he wanted because it was only hair but my mommy-heart realized my baby was growing.

As our children grow, we begin to grow with them.  We grow in our parenting.  There comes a point where they have to begin to make their own choices, and so we hope and pray that they make the right ones.  We begin to trust them to be away from us.

Sure, sometimes they will make mistakes but we are still there to guide them.  There may be times when they have to work to earn our trust again, and they work hard to do it.

They grow, and WE grow.  We grow in our ability to let them be away from us, and we learn to pray as we watch the clock, and are so thankful when they are back home again.

We grow in our ability to let them take more control as we learn to let go and have less control.  We grow in our ability to let them walk out the door with the car keys and not block the door with our bodies, or stand at the window the whole evening, watching and waiting for their return.

We grow in the ability to realize that life doesn't stop for us the minute they walk out the door.


We grow in our ability to trust them into their Heavenly Father's care, and know that He is worthy of that trust.

We grow in our ability to love them BETTER, because to love them better means to let them grow and let them go.


What are you doing or going to do today to make your home sing? Please go here for instructions and/or ideas and come back here to link up to join us today! Please do not put your own "Making Your Home Sing Monday" Linky on your blog.


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I am linking up to these linky parties: 


TheBetterMom.comWhat Joy Is MinePhotobucketHappy Wives ClubLiving Proverbs 31i should be mopping the floor photo e70fb310-7eb7-4908-bb0e-cac50857a9bb.jpgThe Alabaster JarThe Life Of Faith photo NEWRIButton275x150_zpsf908716b.jpg 125 Titus 2 Tuesday ButtonCourtship Connection Teaching What Is Good Messy MarriageDucks 'n a RowFamily Home and LifeWise-Woman-Builds  All Things with Purposekatherines corner PhotobucketMissional Womenhttp://christianmommyblogger.comHappyandBlessedHome.com Please save image and put it in your post or on your sidebar.Faithful Friday Blog Hop Share The Love

24 comments:

  1. It's such a painful yet beautiful surrendering we do with our children, Nan. I'm at the stage where they are all almost of my nest and it's difficult to watch them live their lives sometimes without trying to intervene! ha! But I know I need to turn them over to God daily, knowing He will be with them and be their guide. Thanks for this beautiful reminder of a mother's love and how it comes in many forms!

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    1. I am having to learn that too. My oldest is leaving the nest to get married in a few weeks! I can hardly believe it, it seems like yesterday he was walking on chubby baby legs, lol!

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  2. I agree with what Beth shared and I appreciate your post. I wish there had been all these wonderful blogs sharing with each other their wisdom throughout the years of mothering. As my fifth child just moved out, I can say, it is hard to let them go...but it is something that we have to do. Now, all I can do is pray for each of them as my job is done. With the two who remain, it is usually all I can do as once they are older and still at home, you have to let them go. At least unless they are majorly doing things that should never be allowed in a Christian home. Through parenting over the years, I am sure that I learned more than I taught them and more than they learned. I am a slow learner and it has sometimes been tough.

    On a less serious note, thanks so much for hosting today. I always appreciate the early posting of your party. That makes it so much easier.

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    1. Judy, I suppose it never gets easier letting go, does it? Just as hard with eight as with two.

      Mine are both young adults and living at home (until the oldest gets married next month) but I've had to learn to let go of certain things.

      But we do have certain expectations for them while they're still living at home and we do appreciate knowing where they are for safety's sake!

      I like the early link up too because it's easier for me as well! ;)

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  3. Learning to trust the Lord as our children grow up and go out is a challenge, that's for sure!! But part of our make up is to work toward that end. Excellent post! Thanks for hosting the link-up.

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    1. That's the thing that we've been working toward all their lives, isn't it? Raising them to leave and begin their own lives. Still hard though! ;)

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  4. This is wonderful, and very, very true!

    Visiting today from the Raising Imperfection hop.

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    1. So glad you stopeed by, Rosey! Thanks for leaving a comment! :)

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  5. Motherhood is a walk of faith no matter what age our kids are, i'm learning. I just sent my firstborn to high school, my second born to jr high, my third to intermediate school, my fourth to first grade and my baby to preschool- how did they all slip out from under my roof? Love your reminder to keep loving them BETTER! Stopping by from the Better Mom today.

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    1. Wow, you have one in every school don't you? That's amazing! I don't know how they manage to grow up but they do! :)

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  6. This is all so true. Sometime I want to shelter Reagan from everything but it is ultimately impossible to do this.
    Great Post Nan.

    Thank you for linking to Raising Imperfection.
    Please come back Friday to see if you were featured. :)

    ¤´¨)
    ¸.•*´
    (¸¤ Lanaya | xoxo
    Raising-Reagan.com

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    1. Yes it is, but we keep trying, don't we? I do believe that sheltering is part of our jobs but obviously we can't shelter them from everything, as you said. We have to let them grow and learn some things and make their own decisions eventually!

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  7. Nan, Thanks for hosting the link up. Great Post!

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    1. Thanks, Jen! So glad you popped over! I have missed your blog but haven't been blog hopping much due to a lot going on. But I'll be stopping by soon! ;)

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  8. Thank you, Nan :) I would love to see my button in your collage! How true...love your first paragraph about the balance in how we hold them! Excellent!

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    1. Jacqueline, your button will be added on Wednesday, when I add this to your linky party. It's only Monday and I just wrote this so I haven't had a chance to link up yet! :)

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  9. I so enjoyed reading this. My children are "half-grown" if you will, so I relate to the steps of the growing up-letting go process. I resonated with the part about them "driving a car on their own"?!! I recently thought about this and part of me can't imagine. I try to faithfully come back to realizing I'm grasping them again, instead of giving them into the Father's care. They've belonged to Him all along and have been lent to me. What an assignment!

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    1. I like to think that we grow into parenting, in away, as we give them more and more responsibility as they get bigger.

      But it's still a bit unnerving to watch them drive away at first, lol!

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  10. Oh, Nan, I wish you lived next door. Of course, if you did, we'd spend our days nodding and sighing


    "You can wrap your child up so tight that they will struggle desperately to get loose. And you can hold them so loosely that they will struggle desperately to get your attention....it's a balance."

    Wise, wise words, friend. I'm glad God's grace covers our parenting "mistakes," and uses them for his glory if we surrender them to him.

    Praying for you and yours.

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    1. Oh Lori, wouldn't we have fun?! I'll bet we'd do a lot of talking and laughing too, hahaha! And yes, I'm glad that His graces covers those too!

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  11. Nan...I am in that season as we have one on his own and one that just graduated, trying to figure it all out. I agree that we grow as parents as our children grow to become adults. It's not an easy season but it is one that can be done with grace and love. I believe that our parenting takes on a different form as they grow up and find their way in this world.Thank you for sharing your heart on this topic. And for linking it up at WJIM. Good encouragement sweet friend.

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    1. I agree. We do have to change in our parenting in that we are no longer "parenting" our children at that age. They are young adults and while we can give advice if asked, it's time to let them "fly." But it's hard, lol!

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  12. Nan,
    I can't even think about the "let them go part" yet. :-)
    Featuring at Family Fun Friday!
    http://happyandblessedhome.com/category/family-fun/
    Monica

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    1. Oh I couldn't either when my kids were your kids' ages! Fortunately we grow with our kids and sort of ease into that whole "letting go" part, lol! I'm so excited about the feature! Thank you! :)

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