Sunday, June 9, 2013

What Are Your Joy Stealers?

Making your home sing Mondays


Welcome to the Making Your Home Sing Monday linky party! Every day you are doing something to make your house into a home for yourself and your family (if you have one). 

My point with each Monday post is, what are YOU doing or going to do today to make your home sing?  It can be an attitude or an action. So have fun, do some blog hopping, link up and don't forget to give a link back to this post!  Thanks!


Topics can include marriage, parenting, encouraging women, organization, cleaning, saving money, our behavior and attitudes, homemaking, homeschooling, recipes....the opportunities are endless.


Note:  We had over 60 linkups last week which is awesome!  Don't forget to visit one another and try to leave a comment on at least one blog to encourage someone today!  :)
  


Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Today someone stole my parking spot at the grocery store. It irritated me.  That was MY spot, right?  I had my turn signal on and I was ready to pull in there as soon as the driver finished backing out of it.  But the lane on the other side had an empty spot so another car drove through that empty spot right into "MY" spot.

I had to find another place to park.  As I walked past her car (she was sitting in it texting) she looked up and smiled at me, so I smiled back.  I walked into the building thinking how ridiculous I am to feel like I OWN a parking spot.

So what if I have to walk a bit further?  So what?  It doesn't hurt me and I could certainly use the exercise to strengthen me.  Both in my body and in my character.

My problem is that it's "not fair."  It's "breaking the rules" of common courtesy.

It's cutting in front of me in line at the store, not giving me the thank you wave (that I "deserve") when I let your car in front of me.  It's having 20 items when you're only supposed to have 15, it's "stealing" my parking spot because you are either unaware that you did or too lazy to find your own, and I'm pretty sure you KNOW what you did!  ;)

When our kids were little we taught them to share their toys, to be willing to help others, to let others go first.  We taught them to be polite and courteous and kind.

And I believe in everything that we taught them....... 

.....Until I get to the grocery store and someone steals my parking space.  Until I am driving down the street and some car cuts me off or honks at me. Until I am at a four way stop sign and some car goes when it's clearly MY turn.   Until someone cuts in front of me at the fast food restaurant and places their order before mine.  Until the salesgirl waits on someone else when I was next.

It's my turn.  MY turn!

I am annoyed, angry, frustrated. 

Suddenly I am too busy to wait in line.  I am too impatient to wait for you to move your car, I was there first.  I am like a child and YOU took my turn.

The other problem is that I feel the need to "educate" you.  If I am gracious to you and let you cut in front of me in line, you'll never learn, right?  If I allow you to take my parking spot without honking my displeasure, how will you know that I think that's rude?

The real problem, I think, is ME.  I taught my kids to think of the other person, to give up their rights, to a certain extent, in order to be kind to someone else.

I taught my kids to stick up for themselves when something mattered, but consider letting it go when something didn't matter.

I did not teach them to let people walk all over them, I just taught them that some things weren't worth fighting over or getting upset about.  Some things weren't worth ruining their day or their relationships over.

And then I forget everything I taught them as I go walking about in my life.

I forget to see the glory of the sunset because I'm too busy trying to protect my parking spot.

I miss the beauty of the flowers because I'm too busy making sure that I get MY turn at the stop sign.

I miss the laughter and the joy of the people right next to me because I am too concerned about my rights being trampled on by the person right in front of me.

When I am so concerned about "educating" you, I forget that I need to educate ME.

When I allow myself to get upset about petty or unimportant things, I am upset for a lot longer than the actual "transgression" that took place.

Your taking my parking spot may have taken seconds, but I can carry that anger around with me for a lot longer if I allow all those annoyances to take root in my heart. You may have already forgotten that you cut in front of me in line, but I may hold onto my anger all the way home.  I may even snap at my husband or children when I get home when the person I'm really angry with is you.


If I carry that anger or bitterness into my day, I am allowing unimportant things to steal IMPORTANT things, such as my peace, joy, happiness.

What's more important?  Having your parking spot or your joy?  What's more important, being next in line or being next to your sweet child?  What's more important, holding onto anger and bitterness or holding onto your peace and contentment?

As you go about your day, look for your joy stealers. 


Those little things that frustrate and annoy you.  Life is full of them. 

Life is going to steal your parking space. Are you going to let it steal your joy too?  What are you going to do about it?  What do you value more?  Your peace or your parking space?

What little "unfair" things are not worth fighting over or destroying relationships over, and yet they are annoying you today and robbing you of your joy?

Let them go and embrace the beauty around you.  Don't carry your particular "parking spot" issue into your day and allow it to ruin it.  Let it go and make your home sing today!

What are you doing or going to do today to make your home sing? Please go here for instructions and/or ideas and come back here to link up to join us today! Please do not put your own "Making Your Home Sing Monday" Linky on your blog. As always, please don't forget to link to this post so that others can join the fun!

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I am linking up to these parties:


TheBetterMom.comWhat Joy Is MinePhotobucketHappy Wives ClubExceptionalistici should be mopping the floor photo e70fb310-7eb7-4908-bb0e-cac50857a9bb.jpg
The Life Of FaithTeaching What Is Good125 Titus 2 Tuesday Button  photo NEWRIButton275x150_zpsf908716b.jpgGrowing HomeCourtship Connection Messy MarriageDucks 'n a RowFamily Home and Lifehttp://www.wildernesswife.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/Wicked-Good-Wednesday-Blog-Hop-Button.jpgWise-Woman-Builds All Things with Purposekatherines corner PhotobucketMissional Womenhttp://christianmommyblogger.comHappyandBlessedHome.com Please save image and put it in your post or on your sidebar. Also, We Are That Family BabyLinkUp500px

32 comments:

  1. Ooh, ouch! What a good and "hard" lesson to swallow, Nan! I needed that reminder. I think I have more difficulty sometimes in the small things of life than the big. But you are so right to bring this into perspective. It reminds me of that old saying, "Not forgiving someone is like drinking poison and expecting it to kill your offender." It always ends up hurting us more when we let the anger take over and ruin our day ... life! Great words of wisdom, my friend!

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    1. I've heard that quote before, it's very powerful isn't it? We're only hurting ourselves!

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  2. Oh my. I just hit publish on my blog post and then saw this in my reader! We must be on the same wavelength!

    Dealing with a negative, toxic person who doesn't desire to change can be a real joy stealer, because there is forgiveness and then there is setting boundaries so that the person doesn't control your life, (or turn us into negative, toxic people!)

    I am so glad to have found your blog again after taking an extended blogging break!

    Have a blessed week keeping your eyes and heart on the Joy-Giver!

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    1. I totally agree. There are some people that you HAVE to set boundaries with in order to protect yourself and your loved ones. It may be a painful decision but sometimes you have to do it.

      You have a lovely week too!

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  3. I always love your reminders! I linked up a post about my sister. She is one amazing woman. Going through what I just went through really taught me about the BIG picture. Relationships and loving others are the most important things in life. Getting my way brings no happiness. Serving and loving others brings true joy. Great post!

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    1. Can't wait to read it! I love my siblings and know that I can always count on them. Even though two of my siblings have serious illnesses I always know that I can talk to them about anything and they know that they can talk to me too. (But I do try to be careful with them because they are going through a lot so I sort of try and "protect" them from too much stress!)

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  4. Best answer I've ever heard re: joy stealers -- "Don't sweat the small stuff. And it's all small stuff." Thanks for the reminder today :)

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  5. Thanks for hosting!
    -amy from SewsNBows

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    1. Thanks so much for linking up today, Amy! :)

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  6. So true!!! I started a series last week about "drama" in general, and that's what a lot of it comes down to--letting things that aren't worth it steal our joy. THanks for sharing.

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    1. It's funny how it's often the "little" things that get us down, isn't it?!

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  7. I get super annoyed when common courtesy rules are broken because it is RUDE!! So I get it :)

    Thank you for linking to Raising Imperfection.
    Please come back Friday to see if you were featured. :)

    ¤´¨)
    ¸.•*´
    (¸¤ Lanaya | xoxo
    www.raising-reagan.com

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  8. Its as if you were peeking into my heart when you wrote this ... Splattering some joy around here and squashing the joy drainers.

    You are such an encouragement to me and many others. Thanks for joining our momma notes. We would be delighted to have you link up again, with this post or another.

    Monday ... join the melody
    www.justsarahdawn.blogspot.com

    Simply slip your post into the link up. You can grab the button if you would like as well. I'll start the splash on Mondays. And I know the filled to the brim momma schedules ... so join us any day of the week and link up.

    Sarah

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  9. This is exactly what I need today! Thank you so much for this. Your words really helped me get through this day! You are a blessing! You are exactly right that little "unfair" things are really not worth fighting over. Thank you so much for this!

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    1. Thank you, Janet! Glad it encouraged you today!

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  10. Thank you for hosting the linkup. Thank you this reminder to not let things steal my joy!! I just had something rather BIG that could have stolen my 'tjoy but it just didn't!!

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    1. Thank you for linking up, my friend! I'm sorry you had something "big" this week going on but glad that you are staying positive and I know that the Lord is with you! :)

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  11. This is so true! One of my granddaughter's mantra is "That's not fair!" and I'm always trying to explain that life isn't always fair. But I can be exactly like her! Thanks for this reminder to live what we preach.

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    1. My kids used to say that when they were little too!

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  12. Thanks so much for hosting. This is a great post and so true. We need to take a step back and slow down and life isn't necessarily fair, but it is our lives. It's what God has given us. It's how we deal with life that is what matters.
    Debi

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    1. "It's what God has given us." I like that. So true! He has blessed us with so much and we need to try and keep our focus on that.

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  13. I think finding balance here is a hard thing. You are RIGHT that we can often get bent out of shape over little things. But as Raising-Reagan pointed out, it is RUDE, and I think part of the reason we can get frustrated is righteous anger. When the CONSISTENT thing we see in our culture is rudeness and lack of consideration...well, that IS wrong.

    I don't want my children to grow up believing it's okay to be rude and inconsiderate. But I ALSO don't want them to grow up thinking it's okay to have their day ruined because someone ELSE was rude and inconsiderate.

    Although getting personally offended pretty much doesn't ever help, what IS the right response, as far as what we show our children, can be a fine line.

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    1. You just made my point for me! It is rude, as I said, and that's why I struggle with wanting to "educate" people, lol!

      It's hard to shake it off, but if we carry it into our day we will not only ruin our own day, we will ruin other people's day as well!

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  14. It's so crazy because I definitely know my joy stealers. My main one is poor customer service. I've gotten alot better with this (before it would drive me absolute bonkers) and now it just drives me pseudo-bonkers. I'm working on it though.

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    1. It's funny how we all have our own individual ones! I have a friend who works in the food service industry. Because of that, she has a low tolerance for food servers, because SHE is one, lol!

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  15. I find that most of the things that I allow to worry me or steal my joy are just that ...worries. Most of the time, they never actually come about. I've wasted time, energy, & emotion on something that never actually transpires. God is always reminding me to TRUST. Thanks for this post - enjoyed it.

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    1. So true, Angela! Most of what we worry about never happens and then we waste all that time worrying when we could have been at peace!

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  16. What a lovely post. I was just sitting here thinking that I'm so upset that I didn't get enough sleep. Such a joy stealer. However, I refused to remain in that mode. Life still goes on, whether or not, my husband snores and keeps me up. LOL.

    Sharon
    http://makeitorfixit.com

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