Friday, May 10, 2013

When You Feel Like You've Given Everything That You Have To Give

This is my plant.  I think we can all agree that it has a problem.  It needs water.  Several times a day I have walked by it and said "I need to water that plant."

Even my hubby pointed it out today and asked if I was aware that the plant needed to be watered and he never notices the plants.

It's not that I refuse to water it or want it to die or something.  It's just that I'm "busy" and I tell myself that I will get to it "later."  But then later doesn't come.

I think that we do that as women and moms too.  We let ourselves get tired, dry, and bone weary and promise ourselves that we will take care of things "later."

But then later doesn't come and we are running on our last nerve.  No wonder we get snappy, and weepy and cranky.  No wonder we sometimes say angry words we wish we could take back, or give glares we wish we hadn't given.

We are like that plant.  We have given everything we have to give and keep desperately trying to suck in more life and more energy from a well that has run dry.

We are drooping, but we keep telling ourselves that we will "water" and recharge ourselves later.  But we keep drooping and drooping, our leaves are wilting and our branches are bending under the weight of it all.

We don't have to be supermom or superwoman.  Did you know that?  It's o.k. to just be mom, it's o.k. to just be you.

We need to stop and take a break now and then.  We need to stop and look out the window and enjoy that beautiful sunset and stop noticing the dirty window pane.

We need to stop and enjoy our baby's coos and smiles and stop worrying that Susie's baby is saying "mama" already and why isn't OUR baby doing that?

We need to enjoy our preschooler's sweet hugs and stop pulling away so quickly so that we can get back and finish the dishes.

We need to listen to our child eagerly (but slowly) read us a book that he's learning to read and stop trying to rush him through because we've got to go fold that laundry.

We need to listen to our teenager's conversation about her day and stop planning our grocery list in our head at the same time.

We need to take some quiet moments away when we can, even if it's "just" to take a bubble bath, and stop feeling guilty about it.

You might think that this will lead to more "work"  on our part.  But it's in those moments, when we're fully present, that we find moments of rest that recharge us.

We need to sit down and close our eyes and open our hearts to God and speak with Him, and let Him speak with us as we open His Word.

It's in all those moments where love and laughter fills our hearts and renews our energy, and hope lifts us up and carries us on its wings so that everyday burdens seem lighter, and God's promises are sweet comfort to our soul.

When you have given everything you feel you have to give, stop a moment.  Look around you at what you have, look into the faces of those you love, and remember that they never asked you to give everything you had to give, did they? They never asked you to be perfect, did they?

Ask yourself if it's YOU that wants to give "everything" because you love them so much, and want to love with everything you've got.  Because you're that kind of a mom.  Because you're not trying to be supermom, you just want to be the best mom you can be, but you think you need to be supermom sometimes in order to make it all work.

Don't forget it's o.k. to just be mom.

Wouldn't our children rather have a peanut butter sandwich made with love than their favorite dinner made with resentment or regret?

Don't forget to go back to the Lord daily (and maybe even hourly sometimes) to refill before you get to empty, my friend.

Note: I had this blog post (and a few others) in my drafts folder. I may or may not post them in the next few days, depending on how things go.  Please continue to pray for our friend's family if you would, this is very difficult for them.  Thanks so much!

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Be sure and come back Monday and link up to the Making Your Home Sing Monday  linky party!

I am linking up to these linky parties today:

Missional Women
The Life Of FaithTheBetterMom.comWhat Joy Is MinePhotobucketHappy Wives ClubExceptionalisticCovered in GraceRaising Imperfection i should be mopping the floor
Courtship Connection Messy MarriageWise-Woman-Builds Family Home and LifeAll Things with Purposekatherines corner PhotobucketMissional Women


  1. How easily we let ourselves dry up over and over again. Thanks for the encouragement to take some time to recharge. You are so right! The kids will remember a cheerful mother not a dirty house.

    Peanut butter and jelly for supper tonight, yay! :)

    1. Yay! Sometimes those easy dinners, like pancakes or cereal pr PBJ are so easy for us and a rare treat for the kids!

  2. Good word that you have shared today! Especially so close to Mother's Day. The day that I have so often hated just because I felt I hadn't lived up to MY own expectations, I especially felt like a huge failure since my adult children weren't serving the Lord. HOWEVER, I've left the pity party behind and now enjoy the day guilt free (funny how grandkids help erase all of those icky feelings!) I've learned to release all of that to the Lord and trust Him for their salvation, I cannot save them, anyway.
    Have a great weekend and thanks for the reminder: my plants really do need watering (lol).

    1. Good for you, my friend! All we can do is raise them and love them and teach them our values and morals and beliefs, but their choices are up to them.

  3. Wonderful words, Nan! Thanks for sharing. I hope you have a wonderful Mother's Day filled with sunshine and blessings :)

    Hugs to you!

    1. Thank you, my friend! I did have, and I hope you had a lovely one too!

  4. Love this post, Nan! I'm feeling overwhelmed with everything on my plate right now - full-time job, family, blog... I need to recharge. Thanks for the reminder. Think I'll go head myself to bed, because this mom deserves some sleep. :) Stopping by from Fellowship Fridays :) Happy Mother's Day to you!!!

    1. It's amazing how much we can have on our plates sometimes. It can get overwhelming. Glad that you know when to step back and take care of YOU so you can take care of them! :)

  5. I really resonate with this, Nan. Since I'm an older mom with my nest almost empty, I often wish that I'd spent more time playing with my kids--pushing aside the day's tasks just to be "with" them in the moment. I did do that some of the time, but not as much as I should have. So I'm always encouraging young moms to relax and enjoy the moment. I'm so glad that you're leading the way on this as well. I love your heartbeat for mothers here, Nan. It's an oasis in a desert of difficult days for many moms. Thanks for linking this up with Wedded Wed too and I will certainly join you in praying for your friend's family.

    1. Beautiful words, my friend! My nest is heading in that direction too, as my oldest is getting married and the youngest will eventually move out to finish his last two years of college out of state.

      I think we just need to enjoy those precious moments with them while we can.

  6. I would love for you to share your favorite posts and link up at my TGIF Link Party.
    The party opens Thursday night and closes on Wednesday night at midnight.

    Please, invite your friends to party too! The more the merrier!

    Hugs, Cathy

    1. Thank you, Cathy! I will try and remember to link up. You think it would be an easy thing to remember but sometimes my memory goes wonky, lol!

  7. Never truer words beautifully written! Yes, may we all stop and enjoy today and be fully engaged in the moment - especially with our families.

    1. Thank you! Yes, "fully engaged" is the key because if we're distracted with technology such as phones or internet then we're not really *there* in the moment.

  8. "Wouldn't our children rather have a peanut butter sandwich made with love than their favorite dinner made with resentment or regret?" This is so applicable to almost every aspect of life.

    1. You are absolutely right! It certainly doesn't have to be limited to just our children. Thanks for that reminder today!


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