Saturday, December 8, 2012

The Battle Of The Leg Hair


Image courtesy of marin at FreeDigitalPhotos.net


O.k., whose brilliant idea was it that women should shave their legs? C'mon...'fess up....I really want to know! Who came up with that stupid idea?

What person sat a woman down one day and said, "Look, I really think that your legs would look better smooth. Seriously. Have you ever considered how much nicer they might look? Here, I want you to take this very sharp, dangerous instrument and scrape it across your legs as hard as you can. Be sure and do this several times, as hard as you can. Don't worry if you draw blood, it's only superficial."

"Next, I want you to take this very sharp, dangerous instrument and let it get dull until it barely works. Once it's dull, take it and scrape it up and down your legs, again, as hard as you can. Do this several times. Don't worry if the skin on your leg peels off....it will grow back." Who said that? Who did that? You're just dying to say a man, aren't you? Aren't you?

There are lots of women in other countries who have better things to do than sit there and measure the hair on their legs. Just so you know that I love you guys and am always looking out for you all....I did a google search on why women shave their legs. Clearly, I have waaaaaay to much time on my hands. Would somebody please get me a life? O.k., back to the search. Anyway, there were more answers than I cared to think about and I couldn't bring myself to read any of them. I just decided that there were just some things that we aren't meant to understand. Leg hair is one of them.

I mean, are my hairy legs hurting anybody???? Has anybody ever been stabbed by a stray leg hair? Has anybody ever crashed their vehicle because they were so distracted by the sheer weight of it all? Has anybody ever decided they couldn't go on anymore, unless I shaved, mowed, or braided them? Has anybody ever screamed "My eyes! My eyes!?" Has anybody ever lost their breakfast because of it? Have small children ever ran away crying because of it? (well, maybe they have...I dunno.)

I ask you. Do people write songs about it? Do they cry about it? Do they break up over it? No! No! and, again, No!

So what is the big hairy deal?.....(ooooooh, I am so sorry but I just couldn't resist that.) It is winter time for goodness sake.....winter. Winter when we all need a little extra warmth to keep us warm. Winter when it's time to slow down, and enjoy the leisurely pace. Winter when it's time to hide all of our chocolate splurges under big ole' sweaters and comfy clothes. Winter where we can wear boots, or long skirts or jeans, and just hide our hairy little secret.

C'mon now, admit it, you got some hair-thing happening don't ya...don't ya?! Oh. No. It's just me.....all along....I knew it was just me! I thought that I was taking a stand and being brave, looking out for you all, taking one for the team. I stand alone. Just me. Just me and my legs. All hairy. Now I suppose you will never come back and visit again, if you've even read this far. I have horrified you all. And don't ask me why I am even posting on this ridiculous subject.....I think it was the cinnamon and sugar pretzel.

Men don't have to shave their legs or under their arms. They don't even have to shave their faces if they don't want to. It's just not fair!!!!!

Don't even get me started on my armpits......

 
(Note: This post is from my archives as I am on vacation this week!)

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2 comments:

  1. Ok, so I'll admit during the winter months the razor and I have a parting of ways also. lol!

    There, you're NOT alone. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  2. I inherited my mom's chin hair and my dad's hairy arms and legs. It was white, but looking like an albino gorilla just didn't cut it for me. I started shaving in the 5th grade. My daughters probably started shaving earlier.

    It probably started during that scandalous time period when women started showing their ankles and then calfs.

    mommamindy.wordpress.com

    ReplyDelete

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