Welcome to the "Making Your Home Sing Monday" meme! First, before we begin, let me remind you that our new blog Five Moms And A Blog is starting up today! I am blogging with four other gals (they are a hoot!) and it oughta be a blast so please join us!
Why can't a man be more like a woman? Isn't it amazing how different we are? When the kids were little, my hubby had an awesome talent of tuning them out. He wouldn't do it on purpose, but if he was focusing on something he just was oblivious to their call.
They would say "Dad. Dad. Dad" and he would just keep doing whatever he was doing, not even hearing them. Until I would say "Answer him!!!!!!!"
He also had the ability to sit and watch a t.v. show with a whole bunch of toys around him on the floor and it didn't phase him a bit. He could concentrate and enjoy the show without even noticing the toys.
For me, that was an impossibility. The toys were in my line of sight and I couldn't sit down and watch a t.v. show without cleaning up all the toys first. They were just to distracting to me and I couldn't relax and enjoy the show.
I couldn't concentrate on something when the kids were constantly talking away at me. I couldn't tune them out. The call "Mom?", made in the middle of the night, no matter how quiet would wake me up from a sound sleep. That's how Moms are wired.
My husband could leave the kitchen a mess and go and relax for the rest of the evening and it wouldn't bother him. The dishes screaming from the kitchen, the clothes crying out from the washing machine "Dry me! Dry me!" would be a siren song to me that he could not hear.
However, I could care less how high the lawn grows, and it drives my husband nuts to see it get over a quarter of an inch! He is always out there mowing, and if he can't mow because it's raining, he's wishing he could.
If the oil needs changing......who cares? If the bathroom sink needs fixing, yeah it's inconvenient but I can live with it. For my husband, however, he is just itching to get out to the car or under the sink and fix it.
If a bill needs paying, he can't put it off. He can no more put off his responsibilities than I can put off mine.
He has an amazing ability to focus and concentrate on one thing and block everything else out, and I have an amazing ability to focus on more than one thing at a time.....you may call it easily distracted but I prefer to call it "multi-tasking." And this is my blog so I win, ha!
Yet, sometimes, I expect him to act more like me. God made him a very special way. Yet still, I have been bothered at times that he just didn't "get" it.
Like, early in our marriage when I would talk to him about something that was bothering me, he would give me suggestions. He would want to "fix" it, and that would annoy me. I didn't want him to fix it. I just wanted him to listen to me!
From my husband's perspective he was wondering why I was coming to him with a problem if I didn't want him to fix it???? Do you see how male-female communication can get so messed up sometimes?
We expect our husbands to be like a woman! We expect them to react just exactly how we would react. We expect them to see danger in every corner when it comes to our children. We expect them to stop at the gas station and ask for directions. We expect them to just know what we're thinking instead of our having to tell them!!!
When my husband was sleeping and snoring as he occasionally has, I used to wake up and just glare at him. I was sure that somehow my glare would wake him up from a sound sleep.....I just knew that he could sense the power of my glare and wake up. Didn't work, however, a well placed elbow does wonders!
Sometimes, we are unfair to people. Whether they are our spouses, our children, our co-workers, friends, etc. Sometimes we expect them to think just like us. We expect them to act just like us. And when they don't, we are disappointed. Sometimes, we are even mad.
We put words and thoughts behind people's actions, many times unfairly. Just because our husbands don't think to do something, we can blow it all out of proportion and get mad. We can put words in our husband's mouth, words that they aren't even saying let alone thinking, and then we can get mad at them for it.....even though they never opened their mouths. We think that we know what they're thinking. How unfair is that? I don't even know what I'm thinking sometimes!
My husband always says "Don't infer evil intent." That means don't look at something someone did or said and infer evil into it. Don't judge them unfairly. Don't look at something they've done and decide that you know that they did it just to annoy or hurt you. Don't jump to a conclusion in your mind. Don't decide that you know their motivation behind their words or actions.
Sometimes when there is a lack of communication our minds will make up it's own scenario. And we can blow things way out of proportion due to our own insecurities.
Men are different from us. And I say thank you Lord! There is a reason that God made us differently. It is so that we complement one another. It is so that we can balance each other's strengths and weaknesses!
If we try to be thankful for those differences, and allow our husbands the freedom to be the men that God has created them to be, we will make our homes sing today and every day.
What are you doing or going to do today to make your home sing? Please go here for instructions and/or ideas and come back here to link up to join us today! As always, please don't forget to link to this post. Also, please don't forgot to leave me a comment!